Dear Santa,

            I want people to stop thinking that I have the following illnesses; bells palsy, downs syndrome, attention deficit disorder, bipolar, anti social personality disorder, and sexual impotence. Also for the last time I am not Gay!

                                                                       Thanks Santa,

                                         Steve "The Dell Computer Guy"

Dear Santa,

            All I want for Christmas is for me to be in just one funny commercial and Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen!

                                                                                   Thanks,

                                                                           Carrot Top

Derre Santa,

            All I want for Christmas is for this cut on my cheek to heal.

                                                                     From yo dogg,

                                                                                         Nelly