It's been an estimated 3,500 years since the death of King Tut, and the investigation of his death is still underway. Investigators believe that King Tut was murdered because his tomb was very small and contained little fortunes. Normally when a king died his tomb was large and well decorated with jewels and riches. With the help of DNA testing, scientists believe they are close to finding Tut's murderer. The main suspects in the case are; Horemheb the king's military commander, Maya the king's treasurer, Arkhesenamen Tut's wife, and Ay Tut's Prime Minister.
According to investigators King Tut could have been killed by anyone because he was a quote, "P#ssy". Tut was only 18 when he died and apparently suffered from a spinal disease that reduced his range of head motion. Hieroglyphics carved on the walls of Tut's tomb depicted Tut as having a two inch long penis, with an extension of approximately half an inch.
Despite these limitations, Tut's wife has been ruled out as the murderer. According to ancient writings they were a loving couple. To make up for his short-comings it is said that Tut gave his wife some of the first ever sex toys. His wife did an interview with Pharaoh Fun Magazine (Ancient Egypt's equivalent to Playboy Magazine) just after her husband's death, in it she said, "I love my husband very much. He was adorable, I would fake every time and he would never know."
As far as Horemheb the king's military commander and Maya the king's treasurer are concerned, the only reason they had to kill King Tut was to take his throne. Neither of them tried to take Tut's throne after his death, which rules them out as well.
The only suspect left is Ay Tut's Prime Minister. Ay temporarily held Tut's throne before Tut was old enough to come into power. Ay was forced to relinquish his throne on Tut's ninth birthday. According to many Egyptian sources (Azil my pizza delivery guy) Ay was very jealous of Tut.
"I often saw Ay urinating in Tut's wine glass and unscrewing Tut's salt and pepper shakers." It is also said that Ay wrote the first ever rap song, which when translated from Hieroglyphics to English roughly goes like this, "It's all political if my glyphics are literal then I'm a criminal and King Tut is a little girl. Sometimes Ay sits at night and he cry, wishing Tut would die. I'm nothing to him but I was the f***ing s**t in they eyes. I was king for a moment I squeezed it and owned it cause I considered those minutes golden. And maybe they'll admit it when he's gone and let my reign as king live on through the glyphics that you see in my song. And I'll be King for the year, king for the laughter, king for the tear. Tut's king today, maybe tomorrow the good lord will take him away." It's this song that leads investigators to believe that Ay is King Tut's killer.
